Posts Tagged ‘Initiative’
Cup by Cup
Article contributed by Amy Sargent
There’s nothing like a new year to get us motivated to make a change. Just skim your friends’ social media posts and you’ll most likely read a plethora of energized, excited-for-what’s-ahead resolutions. You’ve probably made a few yourself, even if you haven’t posted them for all to see. The start of a fresh calendar year is the natural motivator we need to prompt initiative and a bias for action.
But what happens in February, March, April, and onward is often a different story. As enthusiasm wanes, resolutions are sidetracked by life. Busy-ness, distractions, and discouragement can shift the best of intentions to a source of shame and guilt stemming from our lack of follow-through, which leaves many, yet again, to announce in December, “Can’t wait for this one to end!”
“You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do.” – Henry Ford
Having a bias for action is actually a competency of social + emotional intelligence. Those who have it are able to create opportunities and seize them, not letting things like the red tape of bureaucracy and other external circumstances slow them down. They are often risk-takers and go forward with boldness in pursuit of the hopes, dreams, and plans. They accomplish their goals and move on to climb taller mountains. But those who do not possess this quality–and we all know the type–probably because we are one of them in some shape or form–are waiting, waiting, waiting for something good to come their way. They often are procrastinators, operating out of either survival or crisis mode, need direction to get things done, and are known to give up easily when circumstances don’t lend a helping hand.
Which camp do you fall into?
A misnomer on being one who is proactive is that one has to take on something huge to make a difference. I love the story of Alex Scott, a little girl from Connecticut who was diagnosed with neuroblastoma, a type of childhood cancer that forms in the nerve tissue. Rather than give up, Alex decided to do something about it. At age four she asked her mom to help her set up a lemonade stand to raise money so that doctors could, in her words, “help other kids”. That first lemonade stand brought in profits of $2,000, and throughout her short lifetime of eight impactful years, her lemonade sales raised over $1 million toward cancer research and to this day continue to inspire as many as 10,000 volunteers, at over 2000 lemonade stands in her name, to make a difference in the lives of kids who are battling cancer.
Cups of lemonade!
The smallest of actions can bring about powerful results. The important thing is that you keep moving forward, keep squeezing those lemons and adding sugar, stirring faithfully, and get out there and sell that lemonade, even if it is cup by cup.
If you struggle with staying power, the good news is that there are ways to jump start your initiative and bias for action. Here are some small steps that will propel you forward when your start to lose steam:
· Make a to-do list. As simple and overrated as this may sound, write down your goals and list out some simple, daily steps to get there. This list can serve as a guide when you begin to get off track.
· Figure out what is tripping you up. Is it fear of failure? Do you have too many tasks on your plate? Are you stretched in too many directions? Are you allowing distractions to deter you from your goals? Attempt to identify your hurdles by writing them down. If you’re not sure, ask a friend or a trusted colleague, or seek out the help of a coach.
· Tackle the tough jobs first. Every goal has aspects which are more enjoyable than others. Getting the ‘worst’ ones out of the way first frees you up to enjoy the rest of the project and helps you avoid procrastination down the road.
· Focus on the things you CAN do and not on the things you CANNOT. Start with these ‘can-do’s’ and get some help on the ones that you just can’t tackle alone.
· Revisit to your list of daily to-do’s and refocus on checking off the next item when you discover you are losing momentum.
I don’t doubt you’ll achieve your New Year’s resolutions this month. But when the excitement begins to wane, remember the lemonade stand, and remind yourself that taking these small, basic steps can help you refocus and keep up the good fight, cup by cup.
“Have a bias towards action – let’s see something happen right now. You can break that big plan into small steps and take the first step right away.” — Indira Gandhi
The thrill of victory…
“The thrill of victory—and the agony of defeat.”
Isn’t that the truth? When we achieve something we have been striving for, oh, the thrill! And when we miss – it truly can be agonizing. When I was learning to water ski as a teenager at summer camp, I had weakling arms and hard a hard time holding onto the rope as the boat took off. I’d never been behind a ski boat before (remember I grew up in a gymnasium). I went down, time, and time again. It was discouraging, especially when other kids around me were able to get up and stay up…not to mention the boat was being driven by the ‘cool’ kids from southern California with their bleach-blonde hair and strong, tan physiques. Once the ski rope handle sprang back and smashed my fingernail, which later turned a lovely dark purple. I fell forward, I fell backwards, I caught an edge and flipped over completely, water up my nose and feeling like a drowned rat. Needless to say things weren’t going well. But I was determined to figure this out! After four classes chock-full of failed attempts, my feeble arms were finally able to hang on and found myself up on top of the water, gliding along, water spraying off the sides of my skis. The cool instructors in the boat cheered and I was grinning ear to ear. Oh, the thrill of victory!
Now transition from sports to the corporate world. Think back on the projects that you have successfully completed – what a thrill it is to accomplish something you’ve worked so hard on for weeks! But along with victories come discouraging moments when our efforts do not pan out–and the frustration that accompanies our defeats can be agonizing.
Possessing a strong achievement drive is a competency of emotional intelligence and is a quality that is well worth developing. People with the competency tend to have a strong set of personal and professional standards and are always striving to improve. They seem to have an expectation of excellence in everything they do and are committed to continual learning. They are not quick to quit. They are able to try, try, and try again until they reach their objectives. Do you know anyone like this?
Not all of us can boast on this as a strong point. I may have been determined to water ski that summer, but there have been many projects I have started and haven’t finished, like writing that book, or learning that new skill, or continuing to move toward a goal at work when I received a lot of push back. Achievement drive is a quality I without doubt need (and want) to cultivate and grow.
The good thing about emotional intelligence is that it can be learned and developed, with the help of good self-assessment and solid coaching, and there are some developmental tips we can begin working on to start the growth process. Obviously we need to start by setting a goal. Use the “SMART” acronym can help you clearly define your goal and make it attainable. Ask yourself, is my goal, specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and timed? (Learn more about SMART goals here: http://topachievement.com/smart.html)
But establishing a goal is often not the hard part – it’s the getting there that presents the challenge. Here are some steps to take to move toward accomplishment:
- Determine the whys behind your desire to achieve the goal. What emotional pulls are driving your desire for success? Write these down. Knowing what these are can be a huge motivator to spur you forward.
- Jot down the risks you face in working toward the goal and compare those with the joys of achieving the goal. Which carry more weight for you, and why?
- Each day, attempt to do at least one thing that moves you toward your goal, even if it is a very small step. It may be as simple as researching a website, or picking up your phone to make a call to get information. Every move toward that goal is a piece of the success.
- Track your accomplishments. Keep a daily log or journal to mark achievements, no matter how small they may seem.
I love what Harvey Mackay, columnist and author, says about goals:
“A dream is just a dream. A goal is a dream with a plan and a deadline.”
As a side note — sometimes, the journey toward achievement can take you down a few paths that may seem like rabbit trails. And they well may be. Think of how often you get online to ‘check’ something and end up watching you tube videos (of the Wide World of Sports from 1978!) While you do not want to be deterred from your goal, don’t be afraid to explore these trails, always keeping the endgame in mind. Sometimes the discoveries along the way will open new doors and give you fresh ideas as to how to enhance the excellence of your goal. The important thing to do is to keep moving. As Martin Luther King, Jr. said in his “I Have a Dream” speech, “And as we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead. We cannot turn back.”
We’ve all heard how many times Edison failed before he got the light bulb to work. But I like how he framed the process: “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.” Don’t get discouraged when you hit roadblocks. You will hit them and they will slow you down. But there are always ways to get around them and if you stick with it, you will find them, so you may keep heading down the road to the thrill of victory.
Preparing for Retirement – Why Social + Emotional Intelligence can help with your career transition
Article contributed by Howard Fox, MA, ACC
I facilitated a workshop on Social + Emotional Intelligence (S + EI) recently for the staff employees of a local university, and was struck by “Robert”, one of the participants. What was most interesting was his general demeanor towards his job, and how he was preparing himself and his employer for his last years prior to retirement. Repeatedly during the session, Robert would state, “Why should I care? What does it matter? And, I’ll do what I need to do until I retire.”
As a consultant/manager, my reaction might be, “well, if this is the way you feel, how would you like to start your retirement early?”
As a coach, my reaction was:
- How are these thoughts serving or not serving those around you in this room?
- How are these thoughts serving YOU/or not serving you in creating a legacy for yourself?
- How important is creating a legacy to you?
- What would you like your peers and co-workers to remember you for?
- What impact do you think your last years prior to retirement will have on you and others once you retire?
The workshop structure prevented me from fully engaging in a private coaching session with Robert, but if he did seek me out for individual coaching, there are a number of S+EI competency development strategies that I would use to assist him in creating awareness, insight, and possibility for what the remaining working and retirement years will have in store.
A successful coaching strategy could entail working with Robert across many of the S+EI competencies, but a number of competencies seem ideal in helping this individual work through the issues at hand:
Self Awareness – What does a “day-in-the-life” look like for Robert? How does he feel waking up in the morning prior to going to work? How does he feel at the end of the day? What parts of the job does he enjoy the most, and what part the least? How would he like to feel on his first day of retirement?
Personal Power – What parts of the job provide him with the greatest opportunities to solve problems and make a difference? What does he do to relish in these achievements? What parts of the job do not give him the satisfaction that he seeks? What would it take to exert control over the things that he does not receive satisfaction in doing? Or, what would it take to feel in control and make things happen? What are his dreams for retirement? What does he envision these days to look like?
Initiative – What are the top five initiatives he would like to see happen in his job that will enhance the capabilities and effectiveness of his department before he retires? Of these five initiatives which one could he undertake today? What support from management or co-workers does he need to undertake these initiatives?
Service Orientation – It is said that people remember their interactions with us if they are treated in a helpful, respectful manner, and that the quality of these interactions drives their perception of satisfaction with their experience of us. What would managers, peers, and co-workers have to say about their interactions with Robert? How often does he make himself available when others need his assistance? How often does he assist in completing a task or support an organizational initiative because it’s the right thing to do, not because he grudgingly (and sometimes loudly) feels he has to?
Intentionality – What activities could Robert plan for and undertake to ensure these remaining work years are as productive and valuable as possible for him and his organization? What plans could he put in place and see through that would ensure his department can continue to function successfully after he’s gone? And for his retirement years, what does he want to achieve for himself and his family? What kind of support does he need to produce this plan and make it actionable?
Interpersonal Skills – What opportunities does he have to interact with his peers and co-workers? How can he ease the interpersonal transactions in the workplace? How can he bring people together and find common purpose and direction? An understanding of the Robert’s DiSC profile or Myers-Briggs Type (MBTI) would add to his interpersonal awareness and development.
Inspirational Leadership – What steps can Robert take to create a vision for his department? What means does he use to communicate the importance of his vision and get buy-in from his manager, peers, and subordinates? How often does he share his ideas and thoughts about how work ought to get done or new initiatives that ought to be undertaken? Chances are, Robert has a great deal of insight into these arenas since he’s been with the organization for a good long while.
Coaching and Mentoring Others– As Robert prepares to create a vision and plan for how his years prior to retirement will unfold, what steps is he taking to prepare his colleagues for his departure? What development, mentoring, and training will he undertake to prepare the staff? How often does he provide constructive feedback and acknowledge and recognize the progress they are making?
Concluding Comments
The opportunity to coach an individual like Robert is a chance to help someone create a positive and lasting legacy, and plan for how they might enjoy and thrive in their retirement years. There is no certainty of the events that Robert’s organization will face after he leaves, or what he might face during retirement. What is certain is that being aware of and developing his social + emotional intelligence will help him show up and be confident in his ability to leave a lasting legacy, support the growth and development of others who will be stepping into his shoes, and in the long run, feel a sense of pride. Much better mindset than sitting back and asking, “Why should I care? What does it matter?” day after day, year after year until he retires. Research suggests he’ll even enjoy better health and is more likely to thrive in retirement as a result!
What We Can Learn From Dr. Martin Luther King About Social And Emotional Intelligence
We usually have the opportunity to see clips of Martin Luther King’s famous “I Have a Dream” speech on this day. I love to listen to his courageous and moving words, and reflect on his inspirational and urgent call to end segregation, bigotry and racial injustice, and his plea for tolerance, compassion, and civility.